raising more money-wise children
by reeta bochner wolfsohn, cmsw

Parents are their children’s primary money teachers because they are their children’s primary role models.

To raise money-wise children, you must be aware of the money messages and signals you send when you talk about and spend money.

From the time children begin asking for things (may I have that lollipop?—in the supermarket, or that doll—in the department store, etc.) they are learning about money. It is up to the adults in their lives to make certain that they are learning the right lessons.

To help children to make healthy spending and saving decisions consider how to:

- Create an environment conducive to discussing money issues as a family.
- Arrange for your children to receive money (allowances, gifts, payment for chores).
- Structure financial learning experiences for your children.
- Counteract peer and media pressures.
- Encourage your children to become regular savers and investors.
- Include children in the family’s financial decision-making process and discussions (as appropriate by age and developmental stage).
- Teach the importance of setting limits and the consequences of ignoring them.
- Show children that love can be expressed in other ways than with gifts, money and things.
- Make certain that your children know that most people can’t afford to get everything they want, and that is ok.

Help your children to understand how to earn money, how to spend and to manage money and how to save (for specific things that will motivate and engage them into developing the saving habit). Teach them the value of sharing their money (with those less fortunate), the difference between needs, wants and wishes, and how to set and how to achieve short-term financial goals. Make certain they understand the dangers and consequences of credit and debt.

Long before children are aware of the role money plays in their lives, they are aware of the people who love them and who can be trusted. A child’s sense of self and sense of security comes from being loved, cared for and listened to. Your time and your presence are important investments in your children’s futures and teaching them about money is an excellent way to spend both.
There is no “one way” or “only way” to educate children about money, but there is a wrong way, and that is to act as if money doesn’t exist and as if it doesn’t influence everyone’s life. It absolutely does.

Provide a time and a place when you and your children discuss feelings, thoughts and conflicts about money. The more open you are about the financial component of your family’s well being (age appropriately), the less mysterious money will seem. When children understand that it is safe to talk about money with you, they will be more likely to come to you with their money questions, rather than going to others who may give them poor or inaccurate information and advice.

Begin your children’s financial education at an early age. Allow them to learn their own lessons, in their own way, and in their own time. When children are comfortable with money and understand what to do with it, they are more likely to spend and to save it wisely, to have a stronger sense of self, to feel better about their place in the world and to be more self-confident. If you want money to play a healthy role in your children’s lives, be a positive financial role model, a good money teacher and a more money-wise woman yourself.

Reeta Wolfsohn, CMSW is the founder of the Femonomics Institute [femonomics.com]. She is a therapist, author, and motivational speaker, who has appeared on the “TODAY” Show and been written about in numerous national publications. The Femonomics Institute provides individual counseling, support groups, products and programs that help women to create long term emotional stability and financial security. 828-658-1919 - reeta@femonomics.com.