—the loo review—
stoney knob café

The loo review (in which we review the loos—rest rooms, that is—of local restaurants) was on holiday over the holidays...and is now back due to popular demand.

Several people this month put the bug in our ear that a good loo to review would be the one at Stoney Knob Café on Merrimon (19/23) between Woodfin and Weaverville. As Stoney Knob is a favorite WNC WOMAN hangout, dropping by to check out their newly redone loo was by no means a chore. But first, you understand, it was necessary to have a plate of, oh, maybe scallops and shrimp on a bed of something—surely I pushed aside as I am fairly certain it had carbs in it. And then I had to linger for a bit by the fireplace, savoring its warmth and the deep, rich red walls of their latest addition—caressed by the just-right music that transported me to the shores of the Mediterranean (or was it the Adriatic?). I admired the gorgeous olive wood bar, fireplace mantle and hearth crafted by our own Sandi Tomlin-Sutker’s talented son, Shane Martin.

La Dormeuse by Tamara de Lempicka on the wall opposite my table provided a lush, dreamy backdrop for the couple sitting beneath the painting. It is a good room for falling in love. In fact, I fell a bit more deeply in love with myself while I was sitting there. Surely Valentine's Day this place will have a line halfway to Woodfin! My one complaint? They need those Itty Bitty Booklights to clamp on the menu so we can see what we want to order! And as part of the enjoyment of food is seeing it, I'd suggest a bit more light at the table......a grouping of candles perhaps?

But I digress, because this is, after all, a loo review. I finally tore myself from my scallops to investigate the loo. Well, yes, their loo is by no means boring: the vibrant, playful color continued the Mediterranean theme of the main part of the café danced across the walls of the loo. But my dinner plate was calling, and I confess I spent very little time in there gathering material for the review.

And Kathryn, I knew, was on her way to my table with the dessert tray, and I didn't want her to have to wait for my return. Yes, Kathryn, that raspberry thing was an excellent choice. (Of course I scraped off the part with the carbs...)

I savored, I paid, I tipped, and I drove home, all aglow with the visual, auditory, and gustatory delights of Stoney Knob. Over the next few days, I began to worry that I had given their loo short shrift, and that I was perhaps not living up to my duty to the readers of WNC WOMAN. So last night a friend and I stopped by to gather a bit more information about the loo in order to present a really comprehensive loo review. Of course it was necessary to try the Greek hors d'oeuvre sampler first. Ohmigod. (There are no carbs in phyllo, are there?) Our eyes glazed in ecstasy. We practically had to smoke a cigarette afterwards. Then we paid, tipped, and left. On the way home, I realized I'd forgotten to stop by the loo for further research. Ah, duty to our readers beckons. I must return.

Stoney Knob Cafe, 337 Merrimon Ave., Weaverville, 645-3309.Tuesday - Friday 11-9; Saturday 8-9:30, Sunday 9:30 - 3.