planting
groundhogs
by julie savage parker
Groundhogs
arent faring very well in my neck of the woods these
days. Groundhog corpses are appearing here and there in my
yard, aided and abetted, I suspect, by my dogs Cricket and Anna.
I thanked them for their gifts to melast year I found
a large rabbit head in my long dark hallwayand explained
Id prefer they let all the little animals live in peace.
Tails wagged and tongues lolled, and all I got was empty promises.
A
particularly large ex-groundhog made its appearance one day
when I was finding even the simplest of tasks overwhelming.
I put off dealing with the body. My friend Irv suggested picking
it up with a shovel and throwing it onto the roof of the chicken
coop, where it would be taken care of by the flesh-eating
birds and out of the reach of the dogs. (Irv has two dogs
of his own, and apparently this technique works well for him).
I
was doubtful that I could master the technique of groundhog
slinging. Visions of groundhog corpses falling back onto my
head persuaded me to procrastinate a bit longer. Have you
ever found that if you put something off long enough, you
didnt have to deal with it at all? At times, procrastination
has been my primary Spiritual Practice.
Stepping
outside one morning, I found the groundhog was no more. Perhaps
it has ascended, I thought, hopefully, relieved and grateful
that I no longer had to deal with it. It wasnt until
the next morning when my eyes wandered up to one of the flowerbeds
that I saw where the groundhog had found his final resting
place. Approaching the body gingerly, I saw it was bloated
and full of maggots. Euw, euw! Euw. I decided the wisest course
of action was to cover it with a cardboard box and procrastinate
some more. After all, slinging maggot-infested groundhog corpses
onto the roofs of chicken coops is no ones idea of a
good time (with the possible exception of Irv!)
At
this point I adopted a philosophical attitude towards the
whole affair. I blessed the maggots, thanked them for doing
their job, and wished them Godspeed. This is the natural cycle
of life, and all quite appropriate, I decided. And I was in
no hurry to peek under the cardboard box again.
But
one morning as I stepped into the garden, I found the cardboard
box was gone, and where it had been was a bit of fur, a few
bones, and what looked like the richest, blackest soil I had
ever seen. Yes! This is good, I thought. And procrastination
having worked so well for me to this point, I still took no
action.
A
week or so later my cousin Katherine and her husband Jim were
visiting. Katherine was helping me plant several flats of
impatiens a friend had given me. Id suggested she plant
them anywhere on the little hill of tiered flowerbeds behind
my house, while I continued to focus on the speck of garden
by my back door. Then we cleaned up, had dinner, and they
left the next morning.
That
afternoon I looked to see exactly what she had done, and I
found she had planted most of the impatiens smack dab in the
middle of the groundhog!
It
wasnt until a few weeks later that I discovered The
Moral of the Story. Stepping out into the garden one morning,
I noticed that the flowers planted in the groundhog were thick
and luscious and radiant in the morning sun; the impatiens
in the flowerbed only inches away were as puny as others were
fine.
The
proverbial light bulb went off immediately and I saw the dark,
ugly, maggot-infested terrain I had passed through the previous
year was truly a gift, truly that which was the rich, fertile
soil for my own blossoming.
Mind
you, I have always stubbornly resisted this suffering
is good for you stuff. You have to know the pain
to feel the joy. Phooey. Who makes up this stuff, anyway?
But I am coming to believe that it is just possible that a
Dark Night of the Soul can be a good thing. Just what the
doctor ordered, actually. Is it possible that what looks like
the maggot-infested corpse of my life is really compost for
my own metamorphosis? The evidence is still unfolding. Ill
get back to you on this.
from Planting Groundhogs: Essays on the Evolution
of a Woman's Soul
When not slinging groundhogs, Julie Parker is a weaver of webs: her
website is handwovenwebs.com.
She and Sandi Tomlin-Sutker are the editors and publishers of WNC
WOMAN.